Stop Telling Me To Breathe!
Have you ever been in a situation where emotions are high, and stress is running at an all-time maximum, and somebody tells you to calm down and breathe? They say it like they have found the solution to all the world's problems, and it is just breathing. Well having been in that situation, and having been with other people in that situation, far too many times I can say that more often than not it has the same effect as just saying “calm down” because that is how it translates to many peoples minds when they are panicked.
So why do so many health professionals, and people in general, throw around the phrase “breathe” or, the tiny bit better phrasing, “take some deep breaths” like it will fix everything? Well, I feel it is a consequence of the plethora of workplace training, mindfulness videos, and pop psychology that we are exposed to these days. The trouble is, many people skip the science and go straight to the action, forgetting not everybody will know what they are on about.
If you have been told to breathe and all it did was frustrate you more, let me explain what that person was trying to communicate and why it can be helpful. When I explain breathing techniques to my clients, I always explain why breathing techniques help and what they are taking control of when they are doing so.
During moments of heightened stress, say a panic attack, being upset, or fear either real or imagined, any moment our flight-or-fight is triggered our body responds with shorter sharper breathing to prepare us for what our brain thinks is needed. This in turn means our body readies itself for fighting or fleeing, even if we are sitting still and not intending to go anywhere. This means that there is a physical panic happening in the body, even if we are not always aware of it. So increased heart rate, blood going to muscles more than brain, and even sometimes stomach or bowels wanting to empty themselves. This is our body trying to be helpful because it has a stress trigger and responds to this as if it were in danger. By taking control of our breathing, we can calm this response. If you have ever done any form of exercise that has an element of focused breathing, like yoga, then you might have experienced the benefits without being aware of what is going on in your body.
Similar to short sharp breaths then, deep-breathing (the breathing that is meant when somebody tells you to “just breathe”) has a calming effect on your body and your brain. Deep breathing is the type of breathing where we fill our lungs down to our lower abdomen, it is where we focus on the breathing and make it deliberate and slow. It sends the signal to your body that the danger has passed, and we can now rest safe. This is not to say you need to be somewhere safe for this to work, remember our bodies only know what's happening by the signals it is given. So if you are waiting for a job interview and feel panicked, doing some slow and deep breathing will calm those bodily responses to stress, and in turn, help you feel a little more calm.
As I always say to my clients, any calming technique should be treated like a fire drill, meaning we should practice them when we don't need them so when the fight-or-flight moment comes it is easier to do and doesn't feel strange. So when you find yourself with a minute to kill, waiting for a bus, in a lift, or even before bed, take a moment and do a few deep slow breaths. This will make it feel more natural when needed, and will also have a calming effect as well, which is always nice.
In addition to helping calm the body, practising breathing techniques can have positive health benefits, including but not limited to helping lower blood pressure and heart rate, reducing stress hormones, reducing tightness in muscles, improving immune system functioning, and as discussed increasing feelings of calm and well-being. All of these qualities are qualities that are worsened by high levels of stress, and there are papers, reports, and entire books dedicated to the physical benefits of breathing exercises.
I feel that all you need to know is that by doing some simple deep breathing, you can take back the control of a panicked body, and reintroduce some calm to the chaos. So next time somebody tells you “just breathe”, yes it is annoying to hear, but now you know what they are trying to say.