Men Who Hate Women
It doesn't take long when looking at me to spot some pretty obvious privileges, and with a Google search and some reading, you will probably find yet more privileges. This is to say that I am aware that the life I have lived is different from the lives of others, and this is why I find myself reading books like Men Who Hate Women and others like it. If I can gain even a little understanding of a life that I cannot live, and open my eyes to the struggles of others, then I will seek that information out, and I hope others do the same.
Men Who Hate Women by Laura Bates (She/Her) has been an eye-opener far beyond what I could have originally guessed. This book explores various groups around the globe, such as the incel community and men's rights movements, and pulls back the curtain revealing the reach and impact that these groups have. Before reading this book I thought that, as I am somebody who grew up online, I was aware of a lot of these communities. I thought I had a decent understanding of these groups but knowing their impact would be insightful, but oh boy was I wrong about what I knew.
Laura Bates does a deep undercover dive into these misogynistic groups and exposes their influence, their purpose, their plans, and what they are trying to influence and achieve. It would be nice to say that these are grand plans that won't have an actual impact, however, they have been shown to have had a significant impact and continue to shape our laws and our lives. As such, Bates highlights the significant reach of these organisations, showing their impacts and presence in our society and every day lives. She discusses their targeting methods, both online and in our media, and demonstrates how they can begin to radicalize people, often without them knowing it.
So should you read this book? I feel that it is an eye-opener, and I feel that reading this book could help you protect yourself or someone you know from the groups discussed in it, either from their intended impact or from getting sucked into their way of thinking. This is something I feel is particularly important as our society, and young people in particular, continue to increase their online presence. Additionally, for anybody thinking that sexism is dying out, and I know there are plenty of you out there, read this book because sexism is thriving, but it has in many ways changed its shape. Perhaps the most surprising aspect of this book is how Laura Bates manages to cover all she covers without once painting men as the enemy, or making sweeping statements about them, which I feel in itself is quite the achievement.
I try and be analytical when I read and review books because I know that no book is perfect and just singing the praise of a book is not a review. My one criticism of Men Who Hate Women is a difficult one to process and talk about because it is how the book made me feel. As a man reading about misogyny, it was hard not to feel attacked at times, like the book was calling out all men (which it wasn't), and if I am honest this impacted how long it took me to pick it back up every time I set it down. Yet the more I reflected on the feeling, the more I appreciated the discomfort it made me feel. It can be easy being a man in today's world, and not having to think all that much about your actions, but this is not a good thing in the slightest. Being made to consider if my world views have been influenced by the hatred of others was a difficult and sobering reflective task, but one that was well worth it.
So the long and short of it is read this book, if it makes you feel uncomfortable then you should read this book and ask yourself some difficult questions.